Idle hands and a gripping case of despondency. from Sakura1215's blog
I am very fond of handicrafts that involve making something that is useful--yet is visually appealing, or something that I can make money off of--namely tsumami kanzashi. Charcoal portraits was something else I really enjoyed and had talent for. I am mostly left-handed but when I use charcoal, I draw with both hands--one hand with a vine charcoal stick, and the other with a compress charcoal stick. Then I joyfully blend and smudge using both of my hands, sometimes along with an elbow or two.
But it has been over a year since I've done any serious handiwork or artwork. I had intended to get into painting, but that had been tossed to the side after a while. Yoga, weight training, and belly dance was put on the back burner. Result? Some weight gain, lethargy, and an awful sense of losing one's identity.
I sometimes wonder if the increase of depression and hopelessness in people these days have a lot to do with advance technology that reduces the do-it-yourself action, the hands-on bit. There's nonexistent satisfaction from nothing being created.
I don't know about other people, but I don't want to rot away in front of the computer, in front of the TV. Letting my muscles atrophy. Allowing my mind to rot. Contending with a little grey cloud hovering over my mood. Counseling and antidepressants never worked for me, and now seems like the lazy man's way of dealing with adversary or just plain discontent. But of course, I know that is not everyone, and that there are those out there with serious mental issues that require some kind of outside help.
Several of you know that I just moved out into my own apartment in a new town a few days ago, after living with my folks for the past 3 years. I had moved back in with them so I could return to school, but during that time I felt restricted for many reasons--some self-imposed, some not.
Now, after years of being uninspired to do anything, I'm excited again to feel the full control over myself and my life--more so than ever before, since I know myself better and I know now what I want out of life (which I didn't before. It very much contributed to my isolation and uncertainty). I had let my depression control me for most of my adult life--but that shit stops now.
A plan has been laid out. I've already quit smoking and am now working on cutting down the drinking so I can improve my physical endurance and ability. Breaking the junk food habit and adding quality nutrition to my everyday diet. Jogging every morning for the daily endorphin boost and to help encourage some adipose metabolism. Drinking plenty of water. Getting plenty of sleep. Hand-writing in a journal daily. And the most effective, most rewarding part of my little therapy plan: a mandatory hour (or two, or three) of 'creative' time each day--tsumami kanzashi, drawing, painting, sculpturing, making various things out of felt/fabric, etc.
Any of you out there notice a difference in your mood when you are not creating something from your own two hands? Does life seem richer to you when you do some gardening, creative cooking, sculpturing, writing, etc.?
The Wall
I appreciate doing things for myself.. and earning money for myself. Do I see a difference when I don't have these things such as a job or whatnot? Kind of. Unfortunately though, if I do not have one of these things it's not always something I can fix that is causing the issue at hand right away.
Kudos to you.
Meiyo--ahh well I suppose training might be your creative thing. I know not everyone is artistic, of course, but I do wonder if it's beneficial to even the less-artistically inclined people do some kind of hands on creation.
Lexi--Ya writing in my journal used to be a big thing for me. It is very therapeutic, but it is something I have not done much of recently, and is something I sorely miss. Ya, having a job makes a big difference--even if it's a job you hate. It does provide some control over your life, and also you appreciate your time off a lot more--whereas if a person doesn't work, after a while he or she becomes a bit loss and antsy. Thank you, hun <3
Beserker--Ya exactly. I've spent so much time getting fucked up or drunk the past couple of years, and very little time actually creating something. I still have my old art supplies, but some of that shit is over 10 years old! Especially my paints. Eventually I'll restock everything, but hell ya--I will start doing that and post some of what I do on here ;)
Many people abuse the term depression. Depression is a serious desease which often force people to go to the hospital. When you have a nervous breakdown, neurosis or you're simply moody you can be overwhelmed with your emotions like sorrow, fear, stress, anger, they can make life harder for you, you can also need some therapy, but still you are able to perform your daily tasks, though with some difficulties.
I noticed that when people have some mental problems they suddenly become very creative. I occupied myself with drawing, though I'm hopeless at it. There was also a lady who earned her money with sculpturing. Some people wrote diaries, some poems. It was as if the mind needed some ways of expressing itself.
Sometimes, people escape from their psychic problems into work, into hobby or exercise. I don't mean that pursuing your interests is bad, it can help as long as you don't run away from your feelings, don't try to ignore them. Because if you don't face them, you will never be cured. Your little demons will stay forever in you demanding your attention.
That is interesting, that some people become creative when they have mental problems? That is pretty cool. I have heard some people having accidents, and when they are in the hospital recovering--they sometimes pick up crafty hobbies. One woman I know of was in advertisement, and after spending months in the hospital after a bad accident, she became very artistic in a crafty way--ended up dropping out of advertisement and starting up her own crafty shop selling handmade things.
Ya, I understand what you mean. I don't know if I ever tried to hide my thoughts/emotions through art, it was just a way to express myself and purge uncomfortable feelings. With stuff like tsumami kanzashi, I find it very meditative--I just zone out and float away.
I do hope this little regime I set up for myself will help with some of those issues, including ones from the past. Even just the simple act of jogging every morning for an hour--I'm out in nature, watching the sun rise, and memories float around in my head. Sometimes I have revelations while jogging or walking, and it seems to help put my mind back at ease afterwards.