Sakura1215

james_westwood I feel ya man, it's hard to keep on track with long term goals, at least for some. I have had the same problems and still struggle to keep on track sometimes. I want everything to happen faster, I crave the instant gratification. I hate waiting, patients is not one of my strong virtues unfortunately...

But, I have learned ways to motivate myself, keep a not so strict schedule, and accomplish short term and long term goals. I still live day to day don't get me wrong, it seems no matter what, shit sometimes happens and things don't go as planned. I just roll with it. The only difference is that I place reminders around my house, on my computer, cellphone, etc. of whatever that reminds me personally of what I am actually working toward. Never let yourself get lazy, and recognize if you are bored of an idea.

The rest is really just up to you I suppose. I guess you could say you are being a pussy about it. You already know why you want these certain occurrences or things, but how bad do you want them? Man up. Being a jack of all trades is good, for personal benefit, but being a master of your craft will take you places.

-james

Nith I had this problem and still do from time to time. I would start many projects and jump back n forth between them and even though I got much done anyone looking at them would see a string of unfinished jobs.

Hyper active as a child and to a point I still am and it reflects in he effort I have to place to focus on finishing a task. Extremes are easy as I found when focused on one task all the others were untouched but the balance act is harder and I think more personal. I say it's personal as each person's prime wants are not the same so it's really only us that can work out our own balance.

I used to go to large gatherings and parties but now I am happy to just talk to one person who has even some of the interests that I do. I find myself having to justify in real terms what scale I go into things. I still have my indulgences but I have learned to savour them and space them out. I find an indulgence becomes of little value unless spaced out by abstinence.

As over used as the saying is, everything has it's time and place. I went so far as to ditch the TV all together so I had to fill that gap with something else. I could still watch a DVD on the computer so I issued myself a movie night and the other nights went to training, study and art, You too have singled out the movies as a weak link so make one or two nights a week a movie night for just one film and see the change it makes.

To some the training at home is good but I found the social gym gathering had a better training outlet so it filled social and training in the one go. Other than that I would say make one change and let it settle into a style before making other changes.

Sakura1215 I'm in the same boat. There's a lot that I am good at but nothing that I am GREAT at because none of it is my passion. The one thing that could come close to being my passion is the one thing I do the least of these days: my writing. I suppose it is laziness and cold, hard fear that keeps me from finishing the three books that I started years ago. I myself am envious of others that have that one passion that they go for and excel at, but most likely I am preventing myself from achieving it in my own life.

You seem to have a lot of determination and self-awareness, something I lack in myself. I think that alone will allow you to find what you're looking for very soon ;)

SatanFirst @Silverdot

* doing something that is a passion helps you get through those times when you feel like throwing in the towel. Because your work = your passion, you push through. Ask the average schmo slogging to work each day if they'd do what they do for free and 99% would say 'fuck no'

* the 'sit at home' v 'accomplish your goal(s)' - some would say your TRUE goal is the former otherwise you'd be doing the latter. Others would claim there are one or more fears keeping you from going after your goals. Since you're a Marine, I doubt the latter

@Sakura

* you can continue to write your books a bit at a time then self-publish as Jason King and many others have done

* the fact you know you 'lack determination and self-awareness', means you ARE aware

For all of us, myself included, as long as we are making progress toward something we want on a daily or weekly basis, we are succeeding. Not everyone is going to be Bill Gates, Steve Jobs or that putz who started FacePalm....Book

If our goals are not bringing us the satisfaction we thought they would; re-evaluate and adjust/drop as necessary. Part of LaVey's philosophy is to question EVERYTHING which by definition includes our goals

Sakura1215 @SF

That is true--I've thought about doing a little bit of writing on the side, but the trouble is it has been so many years that my mind has cleared out previous ideas and scenarios that I had before. It's like I have to be immersed in it 24/7 in order to get any good material written. However, I intend to organize my life a little better and not let disappointments and letdowns get me too low anymore.

And thank you :)

FemaleSatan Okay, I used to be this way, and here is what helped me. Live and die by a schedule.

First I wrote out the goals that I want to accomplish, rather long term or short term. Then I broke them down bit by bit.

Example: Goal: Be as Physically Fit as Possible

1. Get to the ideal weight for my body.

A. Set aside 3o minutes to an hour for exercise daily.

1. 3 days a week cardio.
2. 3 days a week strength training.
3. 1 day a week sport with kids.

Goal Obtained at 125 lbs.

2. Start building up muscle mass.
A. Increase exercise time to 1 to 1 1/2 hours a day.

B. HIIT 3 days a week.

C. Lift weights 2 days a week.

D. Cardio 2 days a week (mostly walking)

E. Increase Protein intake.

Goal Obtained when I can bench press me plus 25 lbs (ie 150 lbs)


Once I have written out how the goal will be obtained I wrote a daily schedule accounting for every hour of the day. I include time set aside to accomplish those goals, time to play and do what I want, time to manage my activities of daily living, etc.

Then I follow it to the letter for thirty days. It takes thirty days make a habit. After the thirty days, it was easy to follow that schedule and I could adapt and adjust things accordingly.

Every thirty days, I review my progress to see if I need to adjust anything, see where I may have failed or succeeded, etc. I set new goals at that time as well.

But you're right, long term goals have to be something that are behavior based. Thing is you CAN alter your own behavior.

Hope this helped.