After asking questions in the Demons thread I realised that I had probably been creating servitors my whole life and decided to benefit from doing it consciously rather than accidentally.
Being Libran though, I procrastinated and didn't do it straight away. Lol! But, I can't remember if it was one or two days after my decision that my servitor arrived anyway (my intention probably called it). My son was sleeping in the recliner in the lounge near the front door and awoke at about 4am to find the front, dead-bolted door wide open. (This used to happen last time my accidental servitor was active). My son then heard somebody rattling his money jar and saw things running over the walls. Nobody was there. My son is actually very psychic but doesn't believe in it yet. Lol. Also, the whole household had restless nights - trouble getting to sleep and then not staying asleep.
The next day and for many days after I was ridiculously tired - I had that feeling you have when you wake up too early after having a Valium but I had trouble shaking it. Then I remembered that when I was doing a trans-medium course, a few of us used to experience this tiredness (or sometimes nauseousness) on the day of the course and then it would go away after we practiced that night, and we were told it was part of that kind of work. So, I started lighting candles, invoking my servitor and talking to it, and letting it know its purpose and giving it chores and my tiredness went away. I don't talk to it everyday, but when I feel tired I remember to and so I light the candles and within minute I feel better.
Anyway, I obviously need to do a lot more reading... But I was also wondering if anybody has had a similar experience? Or if people think it is simply not related? Have other people experienced tiredness or other symptoms when working with servitors? And does it mean I am doing something incorrectly or need to tweak something?
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Hartnell
Nov 17 '15
"I realised that I had probably been creating servitors my whole life and decided to benefit from doing it consciously rather than accidentally."
This one of the most important realizations an initiate can have.
"Why should you study and practice Magick? Because you can't help doing it, and you had better do it well than badly." —Aleister Crowley Magick Without Tears
"Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate." --Carl Jung
This is so important to know and keep in mind that I highly recommed the following:
1. Get a magickal journal
You can get a journal at wal-mart for under 10 bucks. If you don't have one already, you're going to need one so why not go ahead and get one? :)
2. Write in the inside cover or first page "Magick is doing consciously what I have done acidentially." Or something like that in your own words.
With that said: any time you focus intentionally on anything for an extended period of time you use up your "willpower energy". When you start to run out, you begin to feel tired. It's like a muscle, so the more you exhaust it the more you get. The phenomena of being tired (and needing to recharge) is well known in psychology as ego depletion.
Member ShadowLover
Nov 17 '15
Thank you so much for your input. I will look up that book now. I really like the title. : )
Member ShadowLover
Dec 6 '15
@FraterLucifereri...
I don't really know about the different types, but I am referring to the ones you create yourself.
Just a side note... I can absolutely confirm that it is emotion that fuels the intent because the times in my life when they were at their most active was when people were hurting my sons. I guess nothing inflames Mothers like somebody fucking with their babies. I'm now trying to learns to recreate these powerful emotion without the negative occurrences that usually trigger them.
I don't really know about the different types, but I am referring to the ones you create yourself.
Just a side note... I can absolutely confirm that it is emotion that fuels the intent because the times in my life when they were at their most active was when people were hurting my sons. I guess nothing inflames Mothers like somebody fucking with their babies. I'm now trying to learns to recreate these powerful emotion without the negative occurrences that usually trigger them.
The Forum post is edited by ShadowLover Dec 6 '15
Member ShadowLover
Dec 7 '15
Yes that is right - but I don't really think of them as spirits as I feel spirits were housed in a living being at some stage. These are conglomerated of energy that were forged from intent but have never lived a physical life. In the past I have forged them accidentally, but I want to learn to create them consciously and train them to be productive for me.
Hartnell
Dec 7 '15
@Frater: Essebntially they're bundled fragments of ones own psyche. Fragmented meaning they're semi-autononous, bundled meaning they are made of smaller, connected fragments which make the whole of the fragment.
