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Baphy1428

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~Sahreth 'Baphy' Bowden

Baphy1428 Feb 18 · Tags: social media
Zach Black Owner
Nine years ago on this day 02-09-10. I launched SIN solo and was the very first user. I think the only user for a couple days. I no clue what i was doing having little computer skills and no networking skills to speak of. In fact, I did not even know what a network forum really was. I remember moving some stuff from one side of the room to the other and that was progress. Luckily I sounded the horn on YouTube and a couple dozen people showed up. Thankfully Beastxeno saw that I was in trouble and offered his assistance. He was the first in a series of admin to help sail the ship. 


At first SIN blew up huge within the first year. I guess because it was the new thing on the block. back then I was known on YouTube as another Satanist making videos but had not yet really begun to grow in popularity yet. I used what few thousand subscribers I had and fanned the flames as much as I could. 


I simply started SIN for the same reason I got on YouTube. I spent about a year and observed. After a while I saw what I liked and what I thought I could do better. So I did. I created SIN to be the premier Satanic Network just like I set out to dominate YouTube and become the most subscribed to and viewed Satanist on YouTube. And I did. I did in spades with more subs and video views that all Satanists combined. 


SIN started off to be a better version of the few networks I knew of. I remember MySatan, ICOS, Goat of Mendes and a couple others. Each of those networks had their pros and cons just like SIN does. Well I wanted to be better that all of them .... together. And within a few years SIN did just that. 


So nine years later where are we? I look around and I Tell you what I see. I see a few other networks sinking into oblivion. Bouncing around in a barrel like a bunch of wounded ducks. I see the haters who have betrayed my trust and set this place on fire hiding in the distance in the shadows. With no honor and to cowardly to raise a hand and take credit for being a back stabbing spineless weasel. I laugh at you as we still stand strong. Stronger than all the few left put together and I smile thinking to myself ...  ' what a bunch of pathetic weakling pussies. Is that really the best you got ' ?  Where are you all now? And does anyone notice or even care?  


Does anyone know what happened to that fat goofy looking flat chested ugly chick that you use to hang out with in real life? You know, the one who would go to your house and and chill with you. That one who went all the way up to Northern California to visit you at the winery wearing Jason Sorrell SIN shirt. What was her name again ? .. .. Exactly. 


I could go on about a few more but why bother. Nobody remembers you or cares. Nobody missed you for more than a month either. 


So those cowboys and cowgirls that are still left. Pull up a chair. Order yourself a drink. This could possibly be the last carnival to pass through this town again. This world is growing harder and harder for this type of engagement. Like the traveling sideshow freaks our time is coming and I can see the horizon. So lets order a round of drinks, toss your chips in and all bets are in. 


   I told you naysayers once nine years ago and I will say it again....

                      '' SIN aint going nowhere . I am all in ''. 



Dark Enlightenment



Dear RJ Reynolds,

Thank you, my dear North Carolina or Virginia friends, for maximizing my Nicotine intake and designing the cigarette to be both smoother and more addictive.

I am very sorry a federal judge has ordered you to risk losing customers.

You can't let them beat you!

"Cigarette companies control the impact and delivery of nicotine in many way, including designing filters and selecting the paper to maximize the ingestion of nicotine..."

That did NOTHING to make me resent you, RJ Reynolds, and I want you to know I gladly pay 240 dollars a month to 'kill myself' with your fine turkish/domestic blend of Tobacco.

You need to find more clever ways to market to children before the health culture gets to them.

Vaping is appealing to  youth. If you use foreign cartoons (Anime) to promote say a particular vape design they will more likely to choose harmless water vapor laced with delicious nicotine. You may also be able to bypass the efforts of Rob Reiner like fat asses, with their precious goo, have tried to force down this country's throat.

I choose to die my own way, and I want my Camel cigarettes there until the end.

Best Wishes,

Eva 



KaylaDawn666
Infernal Greetings Brothers and Sisters in Satanism, Whether you are theistic or any other type of Satanist I am in the process of looking for those who want to come out of the shadows.


I would love to start the first real theistic satanic church, for us to come commune and give worship to our dark lord, and I would love to make the first real theistic satanic bible, a but I cant do this alone i need other satanists and high priests and priestesses to teach and speak for the First Church of Satan....


the reason for wanting all this is because I'm so sick of Christianity and Islam forcing us into hiding, we have as much right to exist as the false religions, I want us, our path, and our people to stand true and proud out in the open and show the world that we cant be demonized any longer and that we are not afraid to build our Satanic Order of Hell, the Abrahamic religions are dying and its time to show them this truth...


If you Feel the Same and would like to join me and make my goals a reality please message me and tell me how you wish to help, and what part you want to play in this infernal goal.


In all reality this is the best way to Establish Our selves in the open and prepare for the coming of our Dark Lord to the real world. 


Hail Satan!!!
Ave Satanas!!!


And may our True Dark Lord Rise once more and cast his Infernal Blessings upon his Children of Night!!!

Darque
It's extremely hard to meet like minded people here in Smalltown Bible Belt U.S.A. I would like to meet fellow practitioners, especially those that are involved in demonolatry. My current living situation prevents me from openly practicing, so it's really not been conducive to the advancement of myself and my practice. I'd be interested in making friends that would like to do rituals together or even just hanging out and discussing topics of Luciferianism, Satanism, Demonolatry, or any occult subjects.
Darque Jan 13
Paimons_Son1211
Hmmmmm. This is a touchy subject because when you conjure your essentially creating something to manifest into your reality your spiritual plain your life and some things you conjure will easily take your welcome but at the cost of your energy, your essence, your will. And will decive you by sending you certain things or messages to derail you from your course. 


Now this is where it may get confusing, you have to know why you walk this path, What you wish to learn,gain,absorb,manifest or desire. It is imperative to know deep down how strong your will power is and if you have any inner questions or second doubts. You need to work on your ahjna chakra but even before that you need to make sure you are separated from things that tie you to this reality or this dimension, basically grounded so that your more open for self silencing meditation to easier gain knowledge or make contact or even manifest into your reality what you will. But the reason I say these first steps are imperative is to further you inner knowledge of what it is in this path you seek.


 Whether it be material gain, knowledge attributes, or even to see the unseen for better lack of words psychic abilities. Just have the ground working knowledge to not be so easily deceived. Because their is a thin line between being deceived or being influenced. And I assure you that if you are attempting to make spiritual contact one or the other is GOING TO HAPPEN, it is up to you to decipher which one it is. And upon that the power of will is amazing and will grant you abilities you would never be able to receive without making the correct contact and receiving thus the knowledge or the tools to further your abilities to manifest or conjure things that you will.


 I have spent years working with and learning certain things and obtaining the tools to further my path as a True Black Magician. The possibilities are limited to your will. The more grounded and powerful your will is the possibilities will thusly be limitless. If you are a beginner or need information or help don't be afraid or hesitant to contact me, I was put on this earth to help, That is my purpose.


 Have a safe and productive day my brothers and sisters of this path we all walk. And to the people of the opposite path I wish you too a safe journey in your life.


Your Black Magician,


KentiosTheNegromancer,©

Paimons_Son1211
So for the most part as many of you that know me also knows my Patron Demonic Spirit King Paimon. Well first off, I've have amazing invocations as well as evocations during this path working with King Paimon. To recently I was lead on the path of knowledge and during this time of enlightenment I was willed to work with Azazel also and guys let me be the first to tell you, I have been absorbing some heavy stuff working with this entity. The amount of power this entity beholds is absolutely insane. I know I've been offline a while but my recent studies and rituals has required me to remove myself from those things that makes us less grounded to this spiritual plain. My path is still incomplete though as I have taken on the full force of possession by both of these Kings I've finally felt the flame of the Infernal Realm and for the first time my Black Magik has grown to the point I can take a full on 18 day possession by these two kings. The feeling of being reborn as a true Black Magician is amazing. And it's good to be back. Looking forward to hearing from a few of my friends on here as I have a lot to talk about as well as catch up on.
Zach Black Owner
Here are some of the  various versions of modified sigils I have been working on for the Goetia Demon Shirt collection for  Satanic Fashion. All 72 sigils will be going up on shirts . All 72 will be the style as they are a complete set. I  will make the  others available of course as  I  assume no one here needs  all 72 shirts in their closet.  


Kind of a strange blog but google indexes in searches very well the blogs. So,here are the various styles of sigils I  have made. Would  like  to  here which are your favorites.


Fire Sigils  - 


Most likely the collection I will go with .. or maybe the one that follows this .




Neon Sigils



Blood sigils




Drafts








AK
Not everyone dreams. Or they, like, know they dream but just don't remember them -  is how they usually describe it. For the longest time I could not wrap my head around that. I dream at least three dreams a night. I always have, and I remember them pretty vividly. Without fail it's these intricate plot twists, characters with full fledged personas that don't even resemble or even act like anyone I've ever met before, sometimes involves people I know. It's interesting, but to me. I know that someone talking to you about a dream they had is the most boring thing to listen to ever, so I almost never do that on that principle. 


Occasionally, though, I'll have an interesting dream that either involves someone I know, or is, for whatever reason, interesting enough to talk about. So, I bring it up. Invariably as I'm walking them through this plot-line - getting into it like a story about something cool that actually happened to me, there will always - always-always - be a point or a scene that just as I'm about to get to, I have to pause and think to myself nah, nah. Just No. We're going to leave that part about where I started fucking their sister or whatever out of the story. There's always something along those lines that - and I don't care who it is - even if they know it's just a dream and dreams are just weird like that - I'm just not going to repeat to anyone. Never mind write it down on paper for someone stumble across who knows when. Absolutely not. 


With that in mind, I wonder, are anyone's dream journals 100% accurate, really? Because I know full-well some of the most profoundly insightful yet disturbing stuff my psyche comes up with is not going on record ever - and that stuff is probably the most important. 


And that's exactly why I don't do it. Keep a dream journal, that is.

AK Jan 4 · Rate: 5 · Comments: 2
WolfHyde666

Since this is my first blog post, I suppose I will talk about my first impressions of this lovely website. At very first, I thought the design was a bit lacking because I was trying to access the site on my smart phone and the java script is apparently not designed for use on a smart phone since the chat box wasn't lining up correctly. So I got on the Laptop.


After getting on the laptop, the site features work fine with the laptop display. Obviously designed for computer based access. Now that I've been able to access the features better I'm actually quite impressed. There is a list of further reading material, which is always nice. There's discussions and groups. The chat feature is quite nice too.


As for the usefulness of collaboration, this is yet to be seen as this is my second day or so. Hopefully I will meet some equally talented individuals for these type of discussions, as to how we can further the cause of Satanism within our local communities and the world at large.



WolfHyde666 Dec 31 '18 · Comments: 4 · Tags: first impressions of site
harley
I missed a whole shit load and its good to be back. Im getting married i got a new job and today someone got into a car accident trying to run from me and an ass beating of a life time so its been a good year for me. Zach thanks for the congratulations on Facebook. i need to let you all know NOW, that im way fucking better at cutting onions so FUCK YOU!!!! no on a real note i missed being around people that dont cry when i say fuck shit bitch cunt bloody cum bubbles and that christ makes me hungry for chicken on a stick being a reminder and all.......................H.S
harley Dec 30 '18 · Tags: my balls
Winterbeard
https://www.facebook.com/1997125527201449/posts/2226373714276628/


Winterbeard Dec 16 '18 · Rate: 5 · Comments: 1
Paimons_Son1211
So guys, I'm at work for those of you who don't know I'm a 24/7 emergency response mechanic. And this older gentlemen who needed a on the spot belt change and this guy was an obvious bible thumper...... So he proceeded to talk about how God sent me at this perfect time to fix his snapped belt and guys, if y'all could have seen the look on my face. He started rambling on and on and it was getting to the point where I just wanted to work in silence. So I asked him a simple and easy question. I asked so you obviously believe in God. But are you biased in your beliefs? He asked what did I mean. Now mind you what said next blew his fucking mind. I said biased as in your beliefs like is it God God God and no other entity or higher spirits at play. And he said no my god is all knowing and I laughed very sarcastically he then proceeded to ask what's funny. Then i said, look man if your going to believe what you want then you cannot be biased, you have to know at least some basic knowledge on Satan and the other all powerful entities. How can you believe so whole heartedly on something when you think you only know one side of the fence. You need to do some research and learn both sides before you devote yourself to one "Devine" entity.  You are basically agreeing to be a controlled idiot. And I'll elaborate your basically siding with one person and basically blindly choosing one side being ignorant without even opening up yourself to know your so called spiritual enemy's. So your religion has no power behind it and it's fueled by deceit and lies. But it isn't your fault,you was born that way so I don't judge your ignorance. Guys if I could describe the mannerisms in his actions afterwards I'd basically have to say this man turned pale white and I could picture him doing the two finger cross thing that people do when they see a vampire or some shit. And I successfully won that verbal battle as he turned around in silence and sat in his car for the remainder of the job duration. Lol fucking golden. I just thought I'd share a piece of some of my weird late night encounters. Hope you guys enjoyed that as much as I did.  Let me know what you all think about that and let me know if I was to harsh with my statements. 


Hail Satan

Hail KING PAIMON

Paimons_Son1211 Dec 2 '18 · Rate: 5 · Comments: 6 · Tags: religion heartbreaks lol
coolman7789
I initially started this path once I learned what a succubus was. I now understand some but very little about demonology. I wish to work with Azazel and Lilith, but after many attempts I've come to realize I have no clue of how to evoke/invoke such an entity. I'm also  not fully in touch with my spiritual side. I meditate daily as I've heard this increases your chances of summoning the spirit. If anyone has any knowledge i'm open minded to the idea so thanks.
coolman7789 Dec 1 '18 · Rate: 3 · Comments: 7
EdMenonymous Member

I am awake..I am awakening...

Change takes time..yet I am starting to see it..

This shit is my creation!!! 

MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE MUTHA FUKKIN MINE!"!!!

Its like when you adopt a cat that lost its owners. 

It takes time for the kitty to trust the new owners.

I wonder if all of the exotic birds and animals that are taken sold and caged before they take out football fields of rainforest, ever get used to captivity.

I been aware and awake as I can be since the get go.Bad habits,

 lack of inner strength, curiosity commitment and creativity, these are my biggest challenges. 

Im lucky as hell tho, peeps call my probs FIRST WORLD PROBS. 


and they are. FIRST WHIRL PROBREMS

As hard inconvenient aggravating hopeless as yours and my lives might seem the truth is, 

We could beDying in Palestine

Starving in Yemen

Phosphorus bombed or Sarin gassed in our own Rainforest Territory

Suffocating on a 500 miles Ocean migration due to NO OXYGEN

Melting from the inside out from Ebola

or burning up in our cars trying to escape a ravaging forest fire

I could go on and so could you, but you get my point. 

When I see what this world has to go through and look at my lighfe and how ridiculously easy it is..I dont know why me..Why Am I so lucky.I assume that either,

 I am just to weak to handle any REAL SHIT.. 

or I just won the fukkin Universal lottery on havin a super easy lighfe 

with mostly happiness and a lot fun.

Still havent found the REAL ME that picked those lucky numbers yet,

 but Im workin on itY

 Yep yep..I guess I am just one lucky hamster. HAIL SATAN! AVE YE ANUS

I gots mah foods water a safe cage 

AND! this AWESOME BALL SHAPED WHEEL that I JUST LOVE TO RUN IN PLACE BUT AROUND AND AROUND IN! OH BOY!!

OK..Gotta Go! Get ta spinnin..weeeee.yay me!

I am awake..I am awakening...Change takes time..yet I am starting to see it..This shit is my creation!!! 

MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE MUTHA FUKKIN MINE!"!!!
LUX::LUC

EdMhamster Ekstraordinære!!

93 buddy


EdMenonymous Dec 1 '18 · Rate: 4 · Comments: 1 · Tags: satanic hamsters
Paimons_Son1211
To all my skyrim players, I seriously just realized how demonic skyrim really is. Lol am I the only on who notices certain things about that game. Guys let me know if I'm tripping or if I'm actually right.


Hail Satan

Paimons_Son1211 Nov 30 '18 · Comments: 6 · Tags: skyrim
Paimons_Son1211
I absolutely just love those sleepless nights with writers block, oh I just feel so productive....NOT Lmfao
Paimons_Son1211 Nov 29 '18 · Comments: 9
AK
An hour long conversation with people who believe that truth is somehow deeper than fact and/or vice-versa. 


*was Tiny Chat ever good? and why??? I've checked it out enough to where I'm pretty sure now that it's basically meetings for people who haven't yet quit their lonely heart substance of choice. Sort of the opposite of AA. I have nothing in common with these people. I've tried, people. You're on your own, and probably the better for it.


Anyway, the discussion being that truth and fact are somehow decoupled. That one or the other is somehow "deeper"


Just one example where a fact was not true or a truth was not fact so that I might be able to meet them 1/2 way is what I was aiming for. I'd like to see that rare beast to examine. Who wouldn't? But they couldn't. I was being "too aggressive"...


Sure, I know a lot of people who "believe" and would have everyone else believe there is a difference between truth and fact. These people are crazy and not worth working with at all. They live in their own little worlds.


I mean, why would anyone seek out a difference between a fact and a truth unless to somehow find a way to be right while knowing themselves wrong? I see no other purpose for it. 


Is it too much ask? To give me just one example of something that is true that is not factual, or something that is factual that is not true? 


And they defer to "Truth with a capital T" - as if capitalizing a word has ever changed its meaning in the history of ever. 


Fuuuck. That. Garbage. 


That's the womb of weasel words and charlatans. And "I'm" hostile for somehow "not" kowtowing to the notion that "we all have our own truths". 


No.


We don't have our "own truths". 


What we have there are the lies that we've decided are better to live with and believe that we call "Truths-with-a-capital-T" to help us sleep better at night. 


Useful inaccuracies. 


Noble lies is what they are at best. Lies, just the same. It's not an "alternate truth".


At least own-up to that much. I can respect that. Say that, then you are speaking my language. 


Don't expect the world around you to warm-up to why you think your delusions are true. Don't equivocate right and wrong with truth and falsehood. If you're going to deceive yourself and others, do so knowingly and willingly. 


Facts are truths. 

Truths are facts. 

No fact isn't true. 

No truth isn't fact. 


If I'm missing something, please clue me in. I'm all ears, people. What am I missing: In what meaningful and intelligible way are facts and the truth different? When are they ever in contradiction to one another? Never! Facts lead to the truth. Truth affirms the facts. 


Show me otherwise. Surprise me.

AK Nov 25 '18 · Rate: 5 · Comments: 18
BubblesMd
And what size does your profile picture have to be
BubblesMd Nov 21 '18 · Comments: 1
BubblesMd
Okay so I just turned 18 and graduated high school. I’m trying to find something to be apart of or meet people who could possibly have the same interest as me. I’m not “satanist” , I don’t really believe in anything. My family is Christian but it’s hard for me to be one or even try considering I don’t totally agree with the religion or any religion at that but I’ve never quite understood satanism or seen the religion practiced. I live in houston and the only satanist church that was here got burned down by Christian (hence why I don’t agree with the religion) therefore for obvious reasons, can’t visit. I really want to understand this religion every aspect of it good bad whatever.
BubblesMd Nov 21 '18 · Comments: 1 · Tags: #help #new #learn
BubblesMd
Can I meet up with a satanist in houston?
BubblesMd Nov 17 '18 · Comments: 3
AK

"blaming god, blaming mom, blaming you. Never blaming me!"




No really, blame the lightman. This is actually a ponderous point. I'm mulling this over and, for once, don't have a conclusion. 


So, there's a certain mentality - a far and nihilistic extreme (though not "nihilism" per se') that asserts that existence is suffering and that it would be to the betterment of all entwined within it that existence itself neither be nor ever have been to begin with. A point of view from which is seen that the suffering far outweighs the good, and that even the good is transient and fleeting since we all are, in a sense, criminals condemned to death. All would be for the best if being were to cease. A mentality that spits in the very face of the creator for having made being itself. It's a pretty dark place. Cold. Absolute zero. 0-dark-hundred. A nice - or at least worthwhile - place to visit... 'wouldn't want to live there, though. 


One can't. 


That one can't live there is the point, actually. It's a place where souls go to die. Where the mind has determined that the world is wrong, everything is wrong, and that it, and it alone knows the truth, what is right, and how things should or ought be. Being cognizant of such an absolute truth implies infallibility. One's glaring failures, foibles and angst persist none-the-less as evidence to others that such self-ascribed infallibility is mere delusion and yet, to a self possessed of such notions, evidence that the cause of one's failings is simply that the world itself is wrong. The problem is never with the self, but always with the other.

 

I would be at a loss to explain how such a mind-set could not possibly be satanic. If taken to it's natural conclusion such a mind-set would clearly result in a disposition fully capable of acting-out against the world in the most literally satanic ways imaginable. It certainly is satanic, but to a completely intractable extent. One cannot change the world; that is a fool's errand. One can only change themselves. A person convinced, however, that the fault lies not with themselves, but the world at large will go to exceedingly great lengths to validate how their own failures are the result of an unjust world. A world that just does not understand them. A world they reject every bit as much as it appears to reject them


Such a type, for example, shows up to a much anticipated interview obviously drunk and slurring. The interview does not goes well. Such a type will never, ever, say to themselves "wow, I really fucked that up for myself, maybe I should curb my habits". No. What they'll do is come up with theories about how the interviewers were out to get them. That they never had a chance of getting the job. They were being discriminated against. It's always the other. This mind-set itself is a death sentence. Refusal to adapt to the changing conditions of one's environment or to rightly perceive how one fits within one's own environment is nothing short of self-sabotage. Maybe that's what such a mind-set is after? Who can say? There is, after all, something satanic, in the traditional sense, to that brand of self-defeating narcissistic self-deceit.  


I take issue with none of these text-book definitions of the satanic. In fact, I find more value in these than I do a million pages of other's attempts to redefine the word "as they see it" when, in reality, there was never a call for such a redefinition in the first place. If you know your enemies and know yourself, you will not be imperiled in a hundred battles. Subsequently it is as important to know and understand what is traditionally meant by the word - what is embodied in the character - as it is to know what I mean by it. The further the two diverge, the more likely it is that one is just playing with words such as to apply the mantel to their own idiosyncratic world-view all the while missing-out on the archetypal significance and meaning of Satan with respect to the human condition. 


It has never been my purpose to redefine Satan, nor has it been to exalt or denigrate Satan. Certainly not to worship Satan. No. It has always been my purpose to understand this term and its significance - the significance of one's "shadow" in and of itself while not wholly sold on the notion of individuation. 


Study. Not worship. 


So far as I can tell - the closer one is to abiding in truth, the closer to infallible they become. Survival, after all, depends on accurate perception - at least sufficiently accurate to navigate the world without injury or loss of life. It makes sense, then, that the further one is from abiding in truth, the more fallible they render themselves. Now, this is not to say that one should always speak the truth or be completely honest. Deception is in our nature. It is rather to speak to the trepidation one feels when practicing deceit, "reality bending", or "black magic". One must be vigilant to remain cognizant of the truth no matter how great the temptation to believe their own illusion is - otherwise they fall further into falsity and its subsequent precarious fallibility in losing site of the truth. At no point is anyone a greater threat to themselves than when they begin believing their own lies in preference to the painful truth.


And the truth is, with regards to much of life's circumstances, many things ARE your fault. There are very few "true" accidents and even fewer conspiracies. The truth is that it's just easier to blame the other. To shirk responsibility. To take refuge in the false notion that it is other's poor understanding of "the truth" that is to blame for your own failures. I cannot help but think that any true and open enemy of man as a sort of cosmic or psychological principal would do everything in its power to confirm such to be true: that it's never your fault. The world just doesn't appreciate your genius. They just don't see your side. Thus giving rise to as many mini-Hitlers as possible - doomed to die defeated in a bunker, but not before making life utterly miserable for as many as possible with their own megalomaniac delusions first.


There is a part in me and, insofar as I can tell, in all of us that is capable of this, and that is the part I wish to understand. I study poisons, venoms and what makes one susceptible to them; not cures. 

 

It is interesting, by the way, that when confronted with having eaten the fruit - feeling shame - Adam blamed his wife. His wife blamed the serpent. Neither dared say "yes. I heard you and I didn't listen - it was my fault"... such is the human condition, it seems. When first their eyes were opened their first deliberate act of free will was to cover their shame. Their second was to pass blame. 


This is telling.

AK Nov 17 '18 · Rate: 5 · Comments: 3
Brother Shamus

The following is a 10 question college level common knowlege quiz. Some are easy, some are the type you'd find on Antagonists Trivia, Is that even around still?


Have fun.



1. Which of these Countries is 40% Christian?

A. Bangladesh
B. Turkey
C. Egypt
D. Lebanon

2. Which of these is incorrect?


* The name used at time of transition. 

A. Ottoman Empire -> Turkey
B. Prussia -> Russia
C. New France -> Louisiana Territory
D. Great Britain -> United States

3. Which of these is incorrect?

A. Tin = Tn
B. Gold = Au
C. Oxygen = O
D. Neon = Ne 

4. Which of these is NOT a city?

A. Kuala Lumpur
B. Portland
C. Seychelles
D. Addis Ababa

5. What currency is used primarily in Zimbabwe?

A. Zimbabwean Dollar
B. US Dollar
C. British Pound
D. Nigerian Naira

6. Which of these does not have four legs?

A. Mustang
B. Cougar
C. Chevelle
D. Impala

7. Which of these was not a dictator?

A. Saparmurat Niyazov
B. Josef Stalin
C. Nicholas Sarkozy
D. Francisco Franco

8. Which of these is not a recognized national animal?

 
A. Kiwi
B. Dragon
C. Unicorn
D. Aardvark

9.  Which of these religious texts is youngest?

* Note - excluding retroactive 'oral' traditions.

A. The Epic of Gilgamesh
B. The Torah
C. The Avesta
D. The Rigvedas

10. Which of these Movies did not win Best Picture?

A. Apocalypse Now
B. Amadeus
C. Godfather II
D. No Country For Old Men

Ok, there you go. 10 useless questions of pointless trivia only people on Jeopardy would know. I am not writing this to make anyone feel dumb, some of these are tricky. 

But if you scored higher than 3.5/10 you know more than the average American. Not kidding.

That seems sad.

Answers: D B A C B C C D B A 

Brother Shamus Nov 15 '18 · Rate: 5 · Comments: 1
ecole666
I have noticed there is greater variety in Satanism than those outside, and some on the inside, are hardly aware of. Many are what may be called"Laveyan" because they are COS or are of the sane belief as he. To me he was basically an atheist,and did not believe in a real being called Satan,or other things supernatural. Then there are those who do believe in an actual being called Satan and actually worship and serve him. This later type is more my personal outlook. I think many call it "theistic" Satanism. 

However, many of these theistic Satanists,like myself,do not anthropomorphize Him nor do we think he is a being who is all red with horns,a pointy tail and pitchfork! He is a powerful spiritual being,the one true God who was made into a devil in judeo- Christian mythology! And that is all their concept of him(and everything else for that matter)is--pure myth!

ecole666 Nov 14 '18 · Comments: 5 · Tags: satan satanism type myth
CorsettedTrouble97
I need an audio book of Anton LaVey reading "The Satanic Bible". It motivates me, reminds me I am strong. His voice is strong and smooth.
CorsettedTrouble97 Nov 13 '18 · Comments: 2
Gypsiegirl920
why do all these poor people especially in the south keep voting republican.when we all no that is against their own interest , they dont  have a pot to piss in and a window to throw it out of. and to be frank the republicians like  mr trump laugh at them he thinks they are a joke he wants no part of them they are poor trash to him.i mean birds of a feather flock together, but your coins say you are not apart of that bird flock.what really is the kicker most of them have to beg the democrats for benefits but they still want  to hold on to the republican fantasy.


Gypsiegirl920 Nov 8 '18 · Comments: 5 · Tags: gypsiegirl920
ecole666
I am new on here,and relatively new to Satanism. I hope to add more photos in the near future and add more detail. Have to be careful as have to share a computer with others who would not understand,or accept,my faith. Feel free to drop a line anytime.I especially would like to contact other Satanists in the Flint and Saginaw,MI USA area. Hail Satan!
ecole666 Nov 3 '18 · Comments: 1 · Tags: geetings, intro, new
BubblesMd
What is a satanic romance? Is it different from other relationships?
BubblesMd Nov 1 '18 · Comments: 3
BubblesMd
I don’t know much about this stuff, not really sure if I fit but I want to learn
BubblesMd Oct 31 '18 · Comments: 4 · Tags: #new #knowlegde
AK
This is a rough-sketch that I will likely flesh-out more formally and with greater academic rigor when I get around to it. 


---Enochian---


My first introduction to Enochian was, in fact, with the Satanic Bible. I was all of 13 at the time, and it is significant to note that it is around that age where mystical or even mythological thinking gives way to abstract thinking. Certainly, at that age there was, in my mind, a very real possibility that uttering the Enochian keys could quite well open the gates of hell. 


I think this is important. I think that essence is what LaVey was pointing at - how a child's mind resonates with barbarous tones and cryptic references in such a way as to produce psychologically significant results.


Here's an anecdote: I do remember my child hood when I was pre-literate. I remember looking at the encyclopedias on our living room book shelf knowing only a few things about them, which were:


1) They were "books"

2) The squiggles written on and in them were "letters"

3) I did not know what these letters were. 


It is a lot like that feeling you get when you see, say, Chinese characters or the written form of any other language you do not comprehend. It's awe inspiring and mysterious - an alien logos.


Enochian brought back that sense of the unknown in a sort of synthetic way. Intuitively you can tell it has a syntax, there's a pattern to it, it has meaning - but it's yet to be extracted. It makes it mysterious. 


(I am actually fluent in Enochian, at least insofar as one can be. I know most words, anyway. There are no clearly defined rules of conjugation. It's pure rote memorization of a vocabulary that is quite minimal... being fluent in Klingon would be more note-worthy, and also more embarrassing. What was cool about learning to write and read enochian script is that it re-activated the centers in my brain that I'd employ to learn Farsi, Arabic, and later some Korean. It kept that "gate" open)


The problem is this: It is not in the least bit Satan-oriented. It is, in fact, closer to gnostic and highly resonant with the 4 and 12 prophets: Isaiah, Jeremiah, Ezekiel, Daniel and  Hosea, Joel, Amos, Obadiah, Jonah, Micah, Nahum, Habakkuk, Zephaniah, Haggai, Zechariah, and Malachi (16 is also an important number in Enochian - 4 * 4 quadrants)


If the Enochian keys don't make sense to you, it is because you're refusing to look at their obviously "Christian" inspiration. 


If you're going to get anywhere with the Enochian keys, you're going to find yourself plumbing rather unsavory apocryphal depths. Don't shoot the messenger. There's a moral to this story: 


"On the altar of the devil, up is down, pleasure is pain, darkness is light, slavery is freedom, and madness is sanity"


Then again, if Satanism implies a willingness to explore that which you are averse to, and by virtue of your Satanism you are averse to studying scripture, you will find yourself at a permanent and untenable impasse. 


Regardless. Enochian is very much Christian. Then again, Satan is very much a "Christian" concept.


<insert numerous citations - including Elizabeth I and the Bishop's Bible.> 


Enoch lived 365 years and then walked with god. This is also significant. As is the 91 govenors. 91 * 4 = 364. Today minus 364 days is the same day of week (out of 7) last year. This has a lot to do with time and calendars, more than I have time to impart except to say that if you don't think any of that is important, I would ask you this: "why is it the year 2018?". Somethings are so pervasive - so vast - that you don't even notice them. i.e. "what is water?"


Dude - Dee coined the phrase "Brittish Empire" FFS.


For reference, if you happen to be curious about Enochian (there is no better mind fuck out there, I swear). There are basically 3 strands of it: 


1) Authoritative


What you'll find in 

"A True and Faithful Relation of What Passed for Many Years Between Dr. John Dee and Some Spirits"


"John Dee's Five Books of Mystery: Original Sourcebook of Enochian Magic"


"The Enochian Magick of Dr. John Dee: The Most Powerful System of Magick in its Original, Unexpurgated Form"


The above are bed-rock. It's not much different than, say, Liber Juratus Honorii - and if the Christian connotations create a cognitive dissonance between what Enochian actually is, and what you thought it was due to some weird knee-jerk reaction you had to what you read in some Avon book, congratulations, you've learned something new about how gullible and easily misdirected you are. The system works! 


2) Golden Dawn / A.'.A.'. expansions

I think this is genre where the Satanic Bible drew its inspiration from 


"The Vision and the Voice (Liber 418)"


"Golden Dawn Enochian Magic"


"Enochian World of Aleister Crowley: Enochian Sex Magick"


The above are sort of rigid super-impositions of Golden-Dawn style taxonomic thinking onto the source material of Enochian Magic. It "works", but it doesn't actually explain or solve anything. 


3) The Schueler's expansions of expansions

They went one step further in the direction of what the GD and A.'.A.'. did by expanding upon these expansions. In that sense, they're not far off from Simon's Necronomicon or any of Kenneth Grant's work. It's incredibly creative and workable, but doesn't so much as bother to attempt to reconcile the gaps in the source material. It's as if they found an irreparable bus and decided that it's beyond making street legal, may as well convert it into guest house. 


They did a pretty good job in that regard, too. 


Books like:


"The Angels' Message to Humanity"


"Enochian Magic: A Practical Manual"


"Enochian Yoga: Uniting Humanity and Divinity" (yeah, seriously)


"The Enochian Workbook: A Complete Guide to Angelic Magic"


Whatever the case, it's always been a pretty white-light subject matter. 

There's nothing inherently "satanic" about Enochian. Heretical, certainly, but satanic... not so much. 


*pop*




---Yazidis---


If I had a nickle. 


First things first. Yazidis practice endogamy. You either are one by birth or you are not, and if you are not then it is of no avail to appeal to their mythos. You are an outsider and will always be. Sticking peacock feathers in your cap will not change this. 


Their Melek Taus is not even close to a Satan. The comparison is both wildly inaccurate and flatly insulting. The Yazidis are "devil worshipers" only in the sense that anyone else whose spiritual beliefs differ from the norm are similarly categorized. That was the point of even mentioning them in the Satanic Rituals to begin with: our very human capacity to demonize the "other" - often with great prejudice and cruelty. To hop on board with the notion that they are devil worshipers puts you on the side of the very inquisitors you claim to despise. You've failed to think for yourself and see with your own eyes. That is the moral - that you are no better than their persecutors in taking at face value what anyone has to say about a religion and culture you flatly do NOT understand and ARE NOT a part of, and never will be. You are every bit as susceptible to suggestion as the most uneducated hysteric. THAT, I think, is what LaVey was pointing at: Not that the Yazidi's were devil worshipers, but rather how easily it is to convince you that they are and must be. 


There are also those who believe that the Yazidis were descendants of Adam's seed and Melek Taus... some even go out a stretch and say Lilith and Melek Taus or whatever to explain the difference between Jews and Gentiles. 


It is true that the Yazidis do, on occasion, have some interesting features such a blue eyes and reddish hair (like yours truly) but here's the problem with this thinking: 


If you're going to rely on the Old Testament for your historical narrative, you must remember that no matter what transpired between Adam and Eve, Adam and Lilith, Samael and Eve, Adam and some Peacock angel, an important event happened between then and now:


The flood.


The only reported survivors were: Noah, his wife, his sons: Shem, Ham and Japheth and their respective wives. Eight in total.


Meaning that, while it is possible that maybe, maybe one of the wives of Shem, Ham, or Japheth may have descended from a union other than Adam and Eve's, their descendants are muggles at best - at least "part" Jew. 


*pop*




The point of all this is thus: the very impetus behind even looking into "Satanism" from the frame of reference of one who had no prior exposure to it was, most likely, to question ALL presuppositions about the ways of the world and what it is they were told. That impetus should never be content to rest upon its laurels. It shouldn't just "stop" once you've "come out of the closet" or whatever.


The ability to perpetually question your own beliefs and continually slaughter your own sacred cows, no matter how much it pains you, is what prevents you from falling into the very dogmatic morass you originally sought emancipation from in claiming the mantle in the first place.




If ever you've reached a point where you're certain of what's what and that you have it all figured out - you've reached a plateau of stagnation. 


the low-hanging and obvious fruit is worth bringing to your attention


Enochian is Satanic because it's in the Satanic bible and I would have never heard of Enochian if I never read the Satanic Bible. That is wrong.


Yazidis were devil worshipers because they're in the Satanic rituals, and I never would have heard of the Yazidis if I never read the Satanic Rituals. Also Wrong.


If you truly study and not worship, you will see quite plainly the fallacy the guy was pointing at. Demonstrating how not even the most defiant of individuals are immune from dogmatism and are prone to take anyone's say on matters obscure regardless of their qualifications so long as they "sound" authoritative and what they are saying conforms to what they would like to be true. Which is precisely the mechanism by which any organized religion thrives in spite of what logic and objectivity would threaten to dismantle. To immunize yourself from the very trappings you despise, it takes vigilance and, dare I say, conscientiousness that does not - can not - stop just because someone slapped a pentagram on the cover of their thesis. 


Be continually at war with yourself. Doubt. Even go so far as to doubt doubt itself. To admit you were deceived, are susceptible to deception, and to understand the lesson in that. Be ever the ouroboros - simultaneously devouring and emerging from oneself. The self-annihilating alkahest. The uncontainable azoth. The universal solvent is, after all, doubt. 


"Why is a crooked letter that cannot be made straight."


It is also a BAGLE.


L NIMB OUCHO SYMP OD CHRISTEOS AG TOLTORN MIRC Q TIOBL LEL

 

AK Oct 28 '18
AK
*I should hope you're reading this*


Why would anyone want to do that? Bring the best minds of today into a quorum? quorum? Do you know what that means in the corporate world? 


How diametrically opposed to Robert's rules "Satanism" by at least 9 out of its 10 definitions is?


Now, truthfully, how you managed to put up with me for___ years!___ is beyond me. 


And I saw what you tried to do for the site on the periphery. It can be said that your only fault was caring TOO much.


Though you and I are certainly not the best-of-buds by a long shot, the reality is "fuck m!" you were de-modded and basically told to kick rocks on account of what you thought to be (and rightly so) a solid maneuver. 


Why apologize? Why explain? It's just a DNS resolution to a service running on a server - nothing more. The people___ they know where to find each other___ it's probably only 40 of "us" out there, anyway. They'll turn up eventually.


Personally, I think the whole "going back" thing is___ well___ undignified. 


Who does that? If a mod bans me, I don't care if that mod gets de-modded himself, I'm not contributing to that site's SEO by one single byte ever - I'm going to work on projects that don't randomly kick me in gut when I get too far out of line. In fact! I'm going to work on projects that encourage me to get out of line!


Why would anyone do otherwise?


Why would you?


The way I see it, you did get burned. 


<Long rant redacted, concluding: what happened at 600C stays at 600C> 


And now you're contributing to forum that basically told you to go kick rocks with your initiatives and forward thinking! Explaining shit? And to who??? Even I know you're better than that. We all saw it. Everyone with eyes saw it.


Hey, I know you and I don't and probably will never see eye to eye, Fnord, but I can tell you one thing: I know you have heart, and I sure as fuck wouldn't humiliate you by demoting you for exercising your abilities over here.


Just sayin' - I "asked for" what you did to me - and I know this - I wanted it since I changed my avatar to that goofy yahoo emote: signifying that the endless and cyclical pedantry of the place was of the eye-spiraling variety.


You, however, did NOT deserve THAT. Not even by a long shot. That you would go back justifying it to THEM is as well beyond me as it is well beneath you. 

AK Oct 19 '18 · Comments: 47
AK
Let's start with the beginning. This is the best place to start. 


There was a Satanic Bible. It was written in 1969. Now, I don't know about you, but I wasn't even a gleam in my father's eye when it was written. It was written for an audience that wouldn't know what to make of Pearl Jam or Nirvana or whatever was popular at the time you read it. 


That needs to be understood. the "you" that was influenced by the Satanic Bible was not the "they" they were trying to influence. It was well before your time. It was well before my time. And I don't think it's a "timeless piece" - it just happened to strike a chord in the mid-nineties as did grunge... possibly for the same reasons.


It was written as a reaction to a time and place "we", unless we are very old, just were not a part of. In this way it's like reading the Old Testament - you have to understand that yeah! now a days stoning a woman for adultery seems a bit cruel, but we're talking about an ethos that prevailed when electricity and running water were centuries yet to come. In the middle of the desert. Where "fuck you! I can barely survive on my own as-is I am NOT raising some other guy's child on account of your indiscretions!" 


The time and the place is important. It's important both to understand what they're saying and also to understand how it may no longer be applicable. 


So anyway, so far as I can tell, the Satanic Bible was to the Occult revival (read: Acid wave of the late 60s / early 70s) as Trump is to SJWs. And the Satanic Bible could just as well have been 272 pages of "lorem ipsum" repeated over and over. The message WAS the medium. The message was that: there is a book. Its name is The Satanic Bible. Says so right on the cover. See? And a certain type of person, being disenfranchised at a very young age from everything else will buy it, read it, and risk having to hide it from prying eyes no matter what it said. 


It was forbidden fruit. 


Partaking of it was the initiation. 


Owning a copy was the message. 


The contents? It actually didn't matter. 

It doesn't matter. And there's where ToSers totally miss the point! It's a psychology thing. Making it a spiritual thing concedes a complete and total lack of comprehension. 


We all know it's mostly plagiarized. And you know what? That also doesn't matter. It never did. What matters is that there's always going to be a certain type who, for example, study the female orgasm, proper ways to defecate, halal methods of slaughtering animals, how the allegorical sausage is made, and anything else that just isn't suited to converse about in mixed company. These people are "Satanists" - they just, by definition, have that morbid curiosity regaring how the world really works, and they don't need a church to re-affirm their place in society. They get along quite happily on their own. 


Pick something you have a hard time talking about, study it, compare it to prevailing sentiment, and there you go. 


i.e. Maybe eugenics is a good idea. Perhaps NAZIs were a lot less dangerous and far more sensible than communists. Maybe black people just aren't as smart as white people. Christ may have been terrorist. He also may have been a pussy. Perhaps - just maybe - there are only two genders, and people who think otherwise, just might have a few screws loose. Maybe there's no real difference between crack and cocaine other than the stigma. Flat out murder was normal in the US until the early 1900s. Heroin was legal up until the mid-60s in England. 


Whatever compels you to entertain radically unacceptable notions is what, I think, contributes to being a "Satanist". Having the gonads to act upon said entertained notions is what will, when society has its way with you after the fact, be forever considered Satanic. 


"We", unfortunately, don't get to pick or choose this mantel. Someone has to witness what it is you've done and called whatever that is or was the work of the devil. 


Member of anything? Absolutely not. You don't "belong" to a church... or a temple... or an "us". You don't belong to anything. Fundamentally, you don't belong. You're an outsider now and you always were. You don't pay dues, and you sure don't kiss any rings. You do as you do with neither compulsion nor justification. 


And if enough people keep doing as much, as bog intended, the devil will emerge - I promise you this.



AK Oct 14 '18 · Comments: 3
Masaji
Hello, I am curious what religious groups members
here were in before they became Satanists. Please
reply to this message (^^)
Masaji Oct 12 '18 · Comments: 3
AK
A very long time ago - just shy of 22 and a neophyte to the corporate world - I was introduced to the corporation's long range planning team. These were old folk. In fact they were, at the time, still older than I am now by about 15 years. 


These were not the most tech-savvy people, but they knew things. They knew business. They knew operations. They knew the cycles. They've been around a while. They weren't schmoozers, either. These were veteran industrial engineers. Quick with numbers. Could dissect a trend graph just by looking at it and go "no, that doesn't look right - it says 3.5 million - 'can't be more than 2.7" and not just by pure numbers, either, but by actually having worked in said facility. They knew the outputs and building capacities cold. 


They lived, drank, ate, and breathed trends. Quantitative literacy the likes of which I haven't seen in anyone of my generation ever. They did stuff on regular calculators that you'd probably need a spreadsheet and some macros for.


What they did as a hobby was build classic cars - an endeavor that, in case you were not aware, takes a normal person 4-5 years from start to finish - sometimes even a decade. This is as important as it is relevant. 


They were surprisingly cool people - the sort of strange hobbit references and senses of humor you'd expect of any shy genius. I asked them what do you do? 


"We do long range planning" 


"Oh, what is that?"


"well, this is a multi-billion dollar corporation, and while there's an army of us handling the day to day / month to month / quarter to quarter operations, we here - because we've done the day to day / month to month / quarter to quarter deal - handle the longer term projects. Acquisition of aircraft, building of new facilities, expansion into other countries - things that take___ mmm___ more than a year to get done. We operate on seven year timelines. Every initiative you've ever heard on your level supports this broad picture - that's how we've stayed in business for over a century" 


At 22 I'm thinking that it's been forever since I was 15. I couldn't even relate to the person I was back then. If 15 year old me had a "long-range plan" for 22 year old me to follow, I'd go tell that virgin weirdO to kick rocks and go fuck himself. 


This is also why this "long range planning" group was populated by only a few and far older than I. You can teach a lot of things. How long a year really is isn't one of them. 


Hell! The 29 year old version of me would tell the 22 year old version of me also to go roundly fuck himself were he ever to come at him with a seven year plan. 


The 36 year old version... eh not so much. It's around then one starts getting a feel for the scope of what seven years really means. Its not a lot of years. There's understanding and there is wisdom. 


Everyone understands what seven years is. Not everyone is wise to it. That takes a few cycles. Sort of like running a marathon: we all know the distance, quantitatively - as an abstraction. ~26 miles. Qualitatively, not many could tell you as they've never done it. 


What's interesting about the seven year thing is that it also came up when I was 17 and very interested in this Earth Force environmental protection thing (which is normal for an adolescent, I think) - that both fortune 50 corporations and a sort of terrorist organization agree on the seven year rule is "neat" - but what they say is, as a rule of thumb, don't trust anyone you haven't known for more than seven years. 


My addition to this is this: if seven years is a long time for you, you're too young and stupid to even know what you're getting into. Seven years is nothing.


This also applies to relationships - the simple lovey dovey stuff.


Of course! When you first meet fireworks will go off and it'll be revelations times 20 every time you hit the sheets... for about nine months. As it turns out, this corporation that I more-than-work-for doesn't have a "short-term-planner" group. They afford seemingly good ideas to bubble up and dissolve on the off chance that something may stick and on the definite chance that there will be a whole write-up regarding lessons-learned when it inevitably doesn't. They also profit from mistakes. Thoroughly. It's the new entries with low pay that make them. 


What makes a relationship - in broad terms, be it man to woman, or innovation to function work, is___ years... (you're literally looking at years)... two at minimum. At least as many years as it takes for you to start looking at other people and still choose the option you previously selected. At this stage, even two is a little iffy - especially if at 0.8 you already started planning the wedding. That's a bad investment. You need someone - or an idea - or a concept - that's held solid for about three to four years. Something you're really "about" enough to have put a dent in your time on this planet for. 


And this all has to do with___ what's his name? Gott! With his Copernican Principle. If you do not know what this is, the gist is that you can determine how long something will be around with x percent of confidence by virtue of how long it has already been around. If you are intelligent and capable of long-range planning, you base your models around this and not what is new and fancy at the moment. 


If it's been around a while, it'll probably continue to be around awhile. If it's something new, well___ it might work, but not with any amount of confidence at first, and it's only time that builds confidence. 


Faith is anathema here as is elsewhere. 


Open question: what is your seven year plan? What was your seven year plan seven years ago? How did that turn out?



AK Oct 12 '18
EpicFail TITS
The human mind seems nearly incapable of accepting that one day we will return to oblivion. Perhaps it's that survival instinct we all have-- that natural drive to cling to life even when we know death is imminent.

Maybe most of us can't grasp the probable reality that this is all there is. Certainly there must be some kind of meaning.. most people grow up, reproduce have mundane jobs and expire. 

life in and of itself is void of meaning.  Human existence in its entirety has no core significance. So yes, this is it.

However, meaning can be created.  One must focus on him or herself. Finding their own little piece of secular paradise.  

Fuck the idea of an uncertain at best afterlife. No speculation on the reality of here and now is necessary. we need to focus every moment possible on things that are significant to us-- make the most of each minute. We have choices. The three obvious ones are, pretend this life is only a bridge and put your faith in a likely imaginary entity, or live a life void of meaning ..a life of simply existing or make the most of it and enjoy.

End of rant
EpicFail TITS
Why do cats purr? 


Most of us assume that cats purr because they are content.  It seems like a logical explanation, after all we hear them purr when their mothers nurse them or when they are being social with humans.


But on closer observation, domestic cats(purring is not completely unique to domestic cats. There are a few other members of the Felidae species that purr.)  seem to purr in stressful situations like going to the vet or when they are in pain. Some research suggests that purring can be a healing mechanism.

what makes the "purr" more distinctive than other cat sounds, such as the meow, is that is produced with the entire respiratory cycle.(Inhaling and exhaling.) The meow is limited to the expiration of breath. 

It seems likely that the purr comes from the laryngeal muscles and probably involuntary. 


EpicFail Sep 29 '18 · Comments: 2 · Tags: random, mystery, cats, domestic cats, purr
EpicFail TITS
I really don't like people in general and try to avoid them as much as possible. so of course I have severe social deficits.  

I avoid looking people in the eye, I say weird and inappropriate things. And I am completely unable to put other people before myself


but still have no idea why anyone would be offended because I told him he reminded me of a leprechaun? 


EpicFail Sep 27 '18 · Comments: 3 · Tags: social skills, leprechaun, autism, spectrum, aspergers, misanthrope
EpicFail TITS

A dim red light glowed softly, gently, as not to disturb the perfect darkness. An ancient silence whispered in my ear, “nihil hic vivit, neque etiam te….”
As if painted on the tail of a lost memory, the words came from within. “Nothing lives here, not even you.”

 

   I had no recollection of being elsewhere, but a faint murmur, echoed songs from another world. A dense haze blanketed the bridges connecting this realm with others.  A million miles of blackness stretched from far below me to infinity. It seemed I looked down from space at a world long forgotten, and saw a much younger me. She returned my gaze, pleading urgently for something I couldn’t recall. It occurred to me as she stared at me with hopeful eyes that she hadn’t a clue that she was wishing upon a dead star.  

A steady “thump-thump” drummed through the atmosphere. That rhythm lived here in the shadows, sleeping with its red night light. A cozy warmth enveloped me.  I thought that perhaps I might just stay here forever, in blissful nothingness.

 

An unwelcomed light appeared, making its way through the fog, relentlessly pushing itself out of the dark.  From the empty came swarms of insects, beetles perhaps.  Magnetically drawn to the fluorescent beam, the insects terminated themselves.  One by one, obliterated like fallen soldiers on enemy turf.

 

 

The light forced its way through the empty until there was only brightness.  I floated on gentle waves of sparkling, blue water.  A slight scent of salt tinged the mild breeze.  For just a moment, things were perfect.

And just before I was about to slip into dumb complacency, a glistening wall of water appeared. A Trojan horse barreled towards me at a super-sonic speed. Death wrapped in a sparkling box, with white ribbon, engulfed me. It felt like I was tumbling around in a washing machine that I couldn’t turn off.  Lost in the infinity of an abyss, the dwindling remains of my conscience short circuited.

 

            A faint “thump-thump,” rolled through a familiar void.  It appeared a living entity, who came from within me and outside me; protected me perhaps. Steadily the drumming began to crescendo. No longer could I distinguish myself as a separate being.  The tempo remained steady, while a pressure grew around me, and became progressively more intense.  The red light dwindled and merged with a new white light.


The piercing rays glowed more intensely as I made my way through the cramped tunnel. People cooed at me and made funny faces at me. I let loose a reptilian cry. Eventually I escaped into daydreams.

  A still emptiness held me, begging my attention.  And from within, a film began-    a collage of memories.  “Make it stop,” I cried into the deaf ear of infinity. 

 

Remembering my childhood, the awkward tensions of early adulthood, and finally sometime near the present. I felt violated.

 

Through a veil of condensation, an inner reflection escaped into the night.   Everything was so hazy. 

 

Nightfall lurked nearby.  Although cloaked with trees and pine needles, a surreal realm of familiarity merged with an uncertain forever.  Not so far away, an outline twisted and turned into the present.  Someone was drowning in a small body of water that was otherwise stagnant.

 

In the murky night, I saw her submerge into the water. Darkness swallowed her and she was gone.  The sobering recollection pushed its way forward; my dear little sister.


Again, I was consumed to vacancy… loneliness concealed in a dense fog. 
Sadness resonated from the mist--- a wailing wall of grief, pain and isolation

A dark figure emerged. It appeared feminine, clad in long flowing black robes and a hood that hid its face. 


 The figure spoke. Its voice confirmed that it was undeniably female.

"I've been waiting for you." She said, in a soft almost melodic voice. 
I paused, baffled.
Only a soft, “why is that?” escaped my lips.

“I've come to collect you."


An anvil of dread dropped on me.


"come. Walk with me.”

The apparition woman remained calm. “There is only one way out,” she whispered.

She motioned me to follow her into the fog.


I followed her down a windy stairwell that never seemed to end. The fog seemed to be getting even thicker. Sorrow lived here.


After decades of descending steps, we finally reached the bottom. There was nothing there--- just a door. From it, darkness tinged with a reddish glow, seeped through its cracks.

Perspiration dripped down my face. I wanted to run but there was nowhere to run. I wanted to get out of there.

I forced myself to ask, “Where does this door go?” 

“I think you know the answer to that question,” she said. 

The concept of hell had always fascinated me, although I didn’t really believe it to be real.  I assumed that the idea of a “nether world,” was a scare tactic used to hinder people from doing pleasant things.

 

I pinched myself, half-believing I’d wake up. A foul taste filled my mouth and for a moment, I thought I might vomit. 

A dull state of awareness found me in an overflowing bathtub.  Unable to move, I felt a beast known as panic pounce on my submerged head.  Little waves of thought crashed undistinguishably.  I thought to myself, “this is what it’s like. This is what it feels like to die.  Fading screams, begging me to fight for survival reverberated through semi-consciousness.

             

            Without warning, my last recollections waltzed in.  The bottle of sedatives the running bath water.  I planned this. 

 

         The bathroom fogged from the bath’s evaporation. It blurred into misty grey. Breathing proved an impossible task. My survival instincts dulled.

 

       The condensation grew thicker.  And from it, the lady in black emerged.  She took my hand in hers, almost comforting me. A dim red light glowed through the crack in the bathroom door that was no longer the bathroom door. 

 

      I turned to take one last glimpse of my lifeless body. The over flowing water sparkled deceptively. Warm water splashed in my exhausted lungs.

I turned back to the woman in black.

“Come it is time,” she said.
  and I followed her into the immense nothingness.

 

EpicFail Sep 25 '18 · Comments: 1 · Tags: art, fiction, hell, suicide, creative, writing, death, near death experience
EpicFail TITS
so.. There was never any doubt for me that the disney films that most of you enjoyed as kids are pure evil. I could never tolerate them.  animated characters bursting out in song every five minutes, annoy(ed) me with their subliminal messages.. damn them to hell!


only thing I have in common with bible thumpers is that I 100 percent agree that these films are heinous.(but for very different reasons.)  Take beauty and the beast for example.  The beast supposedly portrays the anti-christ. Xians take a literal approach. The world's most well known antagonist is called the "beast" in the final chapter of the world's most notorious book of hatred.  

walt disney likely meant no correlation between his film and the "good book." I do wonder sometimes if Disney himself was affiliated with something real and truly nefarious.  

Beauty kinda symbolizes the following of Christ.  When the alleged apocalypse happens (hypothetically speaking of course,) the epic conflict between team jesus and team lucifer will occur. Of course in both the bible and the film, beauty prevails. sigh I hate happy endings.. and I especially hate it when they burst into sappy disney style tunes or boring hymns. 


so anyone here team jesus? team lucifer? mostly don't give a fuck.. but interesting allegory

EpicFail Sep 25 '18 · Rate: 5 · Comments: 3 · Tags: beast, bible, christianity, disney, protagonist, antagonist, allegory, apocalypse, revelations, sappy
Albert Resigned


You can find anybody on the internet.



Albert Sep 24 '18 · Rate: 5 · Comments: 2
AK



This is a derivative of a conversation I had with my younger, equally as capable, fearless, and intelligent little sister which I'm only bringing up because it only just occurred to me a month or so ago that there are some youngin's about here too (by young I mean 19 well into 31) and sometimes I lose perspective. I just “assume” everyone's been around the sun as many if-not-more times than I have solely on their ability to formulate complete sentences and have to be reminded that I do have an informal fraternal instinct.


-By the age of, say 29, you're going to have accumulated a very, very long list of names who you will never speak to again. Some of them might be your own family. This shocks people as soon as they get out of high-school, and it only gets worse after college. It sort of hurts at first, but you have to learn to discard things. People are also things. You get better at it with time. Unfortunately, it does take practice. You're looking at about 5-6 years of hard slams until the callouses build up.


-Loyalty isn't an actual thing. We're not dogs. It's mostly antidepressants the human animal seeks, hunts, gathers, and uses to stay alive. Everyone is at it. It ranges from hook-ups to prescriptions. If you do not understand what I mean by this, here is a music video to illustrate https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1RuQy8sKKak


-Suicide contemplation is basically pretty normal. Talking about it isn't.


-Women don't get along with each other as much a guy would suppose. We don't know the actual answer to this. It's obscured by the fact that males are a thousand times more apt to swing fists and belt it out. Maybe this is the issue, but don't quote me on this.


-People you do not expect to die might very well die in front of your own eyes tomorrow. You actually might walk into the bathroom and find your mom dead on a toilet like Elvis. That's a reality you end up living with sooner or later. You can adjust to this reality as well, but it's harder than the whole “I met a girl/boy once when I was 23 and it ended bad”


-Stabbing people is only fun if it is justified and you can get away with it and you can run. It is not easy to cut people from your car... unless they are already in your car... in which case, that's a terrible way to treat a passenger and you should be ashamed.

a) Don't give rides to people you feel as if on-the-fence about doing that that to. Not ever.

b) Do work on your cardio. Aim for a 7 minute mile, bang out 4 miles in under a ½ hour, then go shower and start your day. It has so many benies.

      1. If it really bothers our conscience then pick one single charity. Donate a bit to it yeary and tell everyone else to kick rocks. There are Mosques and Churches up the street no matter where you live. Point them that way.

      2. The only thing anyone asks for is more.


  • Guns are also great, but FFS learn to aim (it's not easy). Also don't tie your name to any piece of equipment unless there are insurance purposes at work somehow. Why would anyone do otherwise?

-wear gloves a lot more.


-use and discard ASAP.


-There's an upside to every drug. The down-side is always worse.



-Unless it's your friend or attorney, go mime status. You don't “need” to talk to anyone. You do because you feel like it. Sometimes you don't. That “don't talk to strangers” instinct applies across the board no matter what.


-As soon as they say “Let it” drop it. Drop everything about it with 0 by way of hesitation. This goes through the whole range from women with men problems to men with women problems to criminality. It'll suck. No one wants to kiss an XXX amount of something good bye, but you need to learn to do that or you're going to find out real quick how snitches are made if you don't.


There is 1. 0. and null. Learn to juggle those.




It's the only direction I have to provide. Do you. Keep your eyes open and ditch whatever isn't working as quick as possible. Hanging on to it causes all sorts of problems. 

AK Sep 21 '18 · Comments: 8
AK
There are two legitimate definitions of it floating out there, and a another third one that doesn't really mean anything. The former two are related, but you have to have an exceptionally high IQ to grok it. The latter is a bunch of whatever.


There's what Bhattacharya nailed (if you haven't read anything by him, come back when you have): that society went all from matriarchal to patriarchal - the same thing the Book of the Law runs-through only with a sharper and less drug addled mind. Revering the feminine is and will hence-to-forth be counter-current for reasons no one really has any answers for other than that this also demarcated the shift from material / earth based cultus to the more spiritual.  You get your father's last name but why? Short of orphanage, there's never any doubt as to who your mother is. Paternity is questionable. That's the "horned god". The father who never picked up the slack. There's a lot of that as an undercurrent, I think stemming from this.


The other one is this: There is the path of law and Torah and obedience (right) and there's the path of suffering (left). This is what "free-will" costs. If you "sin", it's going to hurt, I've run the numbers and it just does. Sooner or later. 


It gets darker every mo(u)rning. 


I can't and won't speak for anyone, but the general idea is that autonomy trumps legislation. That sort of attitude is what makes you human. It's NOT antinomian. Antinomian is a faith vs works issue that leans to a sort of Pauline slant I just can't get behind. I've tried.  "Criminal" sounds better anyway.



AK Sep 20 '18
AK
This comes up a lot (<-fine, Albert, you win).


Not a lot of people like me. We get complaints galore about what an awful person I am to be running this site. I read some of them. 
So tell me about it! Tell me what exactly I am doing to piss you off. Let's dicuss. 
I've known worse people. 
By all known standards, I'm actually polite. Most actual Satanists would criticize how soft I am. It's a fraternal instinct. Not that we're brothers or sisters. You're not on that level, I promise. It's just a habit. I coddle. Sometimes. If you seem worth it. I enjoy watching people evolve. This is a hobby of mine. Not many people do it. They usually go away. Snuggle in their Wiccan covens, drum circles or whatever. 


So, ok. Does AK believe in / worship the devil? He doesn't. He becomes it. Namely out of boredom. Do you have hobbies? I also have hobbies. To him it's an ideal. An asymptote. A mask. An aspiration. An extreme. An idea. An impetus. An itch to scratch. Etc. That's all there is to it. Something to do. Somewhere between a philosophy and a religion. A way of going about things. Not a pleasant one. In a word: visceral. 


It is attitudinal. 

Descriptive. 


Like awful enough to probably end up in prison, but smart/quick enough for that never be a problem. Repeatedly. BAMFs. I don't think I'm the only one.


I don't believe in anything. We certainly don't push that around here. 


So if you come at me with your "LadY Astorath"s, Lilith, Azazle, or Jesus or (worse) the G-man himself. I despise you on principle alone. I think you're out of your mind and should seek professional help. I have no other way to explain it. I've been "cursed" since February. It's late September now. It won't work because it just doesn't. 


Do you know how "we" curse people? Work. Hands in the dirt work. Bury a body six (ok fine four feet) types of work. 


This is not a cult. "We're" not going to hold hands and prance around. We're going to throw rocks at each other, and it will be fun. 


"we're" also not going to do political activities. The reason that "we're" not going to do that is because its going to hurt whatever cause it is. I've done the math. It's suicidal is what that is. Prove me wrong. I promise you, if you're about any political swing, the devil is the very last thing you want to associate with it. It's a stupid idea. Moronic. If you don't see that, then chances are very high that you might be indescribably histrionic and probably don't actually care about anything but the sound of your own voice. "We" actually have a place for you. 


Anyway, it's not "devil worship" - its admiration of the___ ummm___ not-quote-unquote-good inside. If you have a different opinion, I am all ears, but I haven't heard an importation one yet. All I hear is complaining. 


I've heard nothing but womanly complaints. Educate me. Tell me why your altars mean a single thing. I don't think they do. Maybe I'm wrong. State your case. I'll listen. 


Now, the terrible people. The truly awful. Legitimately degenerate. *smirks* I like them. I like them more than the moralfags. I encourage and harvest them. The genuinely awful. 

If, for example, you think "Satanism" is about being the best that you can be: I say "join the army". Find a cause to applaud. Be all you can be. Win that trophy. That's not what I'm doing here. It's mostly visceral and somewhat sexual. Religious in a way that other religions don't want to touch. Because whether you admit it or not, your only wants of this world are sex and violence. And again, if you have better ideas I'm all ears. I haven't heard any yet. 

I'm still waiting. 


 Surprise me. 

AK Sep 18 '18 · Rate: 5 · Comments: 14
AK
This guy. Who is he? He's president of the Philippines. He's everything you like about Trump to the nth power. He's a lunatic in literally all the best ways. You know what he does? He just orders shabu (shabu is meth, btw) pushers killed. No trials. Absolutely not. That costs money. You wind up shot with some tape over your mouth - likely with your stash stolen. 


This crazy, demented man is my hero. I can't go a single day without stumbling upon something awesome he's done or said. And you know what's more messed up? He's actually making Manila safer! Have you been to Manila? Life is really, really cheap over there. He cleaned it up super quick. And how, you ask? Just by being a lunatic. The type of lunatic you want in positions of power. Who doesn't give a single fart about human "rights" violations. The man is awesome, and if you haven't been following him, you should start following him. He's my adopted grandfather. Totally out of his mind, but in this sort of hyper-productive way that has the gonads to threaten his own military(!) - this guy is literally my favorite person ever.


And I quote: "Incites sedition and rebellion against himself" and he's the leader of what would have been the 51st state. Pay more attention to this guy, you will not be let down. He's like a Stalin, only funnier, Catholic-ier, and also alive (somehow... I don't understand that part, either, but it's super amusing)



AK Sep 16 '18 · Comments: 3
AK
Finality and such. It doesn't matter as much to one who keeps in motion. Just don't give yourself the time to reconsider, wax-nostalgic. Sh!t don't even apologize. Just keep moving. Lose the notion of re-dos or do-overs. You're either going to make it or you're going to fall, and either way the end is the same - keep moving. Fell and busted your ass? Wipe that scowl of your face. Keep moving. Land it with authority? Wipe that smile off your your face. Keep moving. 


Gravity won't defy itself. 


"can't just go skating through life, son"

"I can and should"

AK Sep 12 '18
AK
Amaroli, it's called. Well___ that's how I learned of it. What struck me about it, though, wasn't its dubious health benefits at all. What struck me about it was how repulsive I at first found the practice. 


All the other mudras, shatkarmas, whatever - were met with a "yeah. sure, fine." - it's yoga. The body can do a ton of things one wouldn't expect if you treat it like the cadaver that it is, and there's value to this. Swallowing a piece of cloth while holding one end to clean out my esophagus is one thing. I am my own well-oiled gun in this regard. So too it goes with the warm water up the butt. The tongue scraping. Neti pots. etc. Think "clean the cadaver" and you get the gist. 


The piss drinking. Ah. That took a while. That was one of those "yeah, everything but *that*" type of deals. Piss smells like piss, and the health benefits seem... eh... unlikely. I still don't buy into them. 


What it was was that I saw a hang-up, and hang-ups are the things you want to probe. Those are the territory markers. 
"Well why not drink your own pee? You do literally everything else *but* that... and even the butt stuff is kind of weird. Besides, it's yours and it is sterile"
"but it's gross and it smells!"


"Fucking Nancy"


So I peed into a cup, and took a sip. It was warm. It tasted not at all like it smelled. It tasted simply like the sea only less salty. It reminded me of home.


  *turns out you spend the first nine months of your life swimming in your mother's proto-pee. It's pee. "Amniotic" is just a polite way of saying it. Leave the mysteries of Uranus to the cryptically and poetically inclined - we know what's what. 


So now I do this every morning, but not for the reasons one might think:


I do not stand-by any health claims. As far as I'm concerned it is still toxic. 


What I do stand by is this: that if you start your day downing a gulp of your own pee, no matter what happens - anything at all - it cannot possibly get any worse. Know this. Do this. Go forth into the world. 


Start every day from the bottom. Staring at the bottom of a glass of your own pee. It only gets better by noon.



AK Sep 12 '18 · Rate: 5 · Comments: 7
Obscura TITS

“Maybe you’re not the hero you thought you were.”


I sit with scarred, armored, war-torn Zadkiel on a threadbare couch, my twin angel and second-in-command general of Michael, of whom we are both standard bearers, I reconnaissance, he defense.  We are reminiscing about the War (there is only ever one War, don’t let mortals fool you otherwise) and Zeke’s eyes are alight with fire and rambunctiousness.  He clutches his sword between his kneecaps, driven down into the wood of the floor, and chortles like a jackal.


“Gaby kept running around delivering messages he didn’t see my infantry plowing through him.  That was the first time he died.  Oh, what a little bird flitting about, unaware he’s in the way with those high falutin messages straight from Mikey himself.”


I bring my knees to my lap and nestle against his wing.  He has a familiar face lit with fire, like the gentle soul that houses him is in vengeance mode.  The night before I fell asleep, I saw him in pointed spidery silver and gold armor with gauntlets and lamellar plating and a visor that hid darkness and burning blue eyes that would flicker to red like coals.  Zadkiel kept cutting the air with his flaming sword as if to spell betrayal out for me, only I couldn’t catch on, not in the awake state at least.


“How did you die, Zadkiel?” I ask, hesitantly.


Zadkiel gives  wild laugh.  “Oh, how didn’t I die?  I bled out in the trenches.  I took bullets through the heart.  Stabbed by an underling that didn’t like my iron fist.  The question, my dear, is that I always die, it’s only a matter of time.  Some more gruesome than others.”


I think back to my death, that first fall from grace, and can’t help but ask: “Do you remember me, Zad?”


Zadkiel sighs like wind through an empty carnival.  Like he is haunted by me, which is likely the case: “You were put on trial for corrupting demons during your reconnaissance missions, Jo. Up to scale 11, you ruined the . At the end, we couldn’t tell whose side you were on but your own. You were judged as a traitor.  Due for execution but you died anyway in one last coup d etat.  Always the wild child, Jo.”


There are tears in his eyes and he doesn’t look at me.  I can barely look at my own legs.


“Oh…” I speak softly, remembering the lore.  Zophael, the Herald of Hell, with sympathies towards the fallen.  Zophiel, the fallen angel of Maria del Ocidente’s poem.  Zophael, the one who took the side of the fallen and rebelled against heaven.  Zophiel, Heaven’s double-timing spy that got in too deep.


Three battalions met the day I died.  My own rebels, hewn from fallen and angels.  Samael’s forces.  Michael’s legions.  Three separate battles: those that would restore balance, those that would drag the world to Hell, and those that would enforce the mono-culture of Heaven.  I have met those that took my side.  They were much fewer, possibly not a third, but perhaps the neutral angels that fell to Earth and became the land, sea, and forest elementals.  Perhaps we did make a stand, however brief, and when I took Satan’s spear through the heart for Michael, I abandoned not only my post but betrayed both sides.


A traitor to both heaven and hell.  Playing my own little games.  Turning angels on demons and demons on angels.


We are not always heroes in our own stories.  At best, we might wrangle some sympathy from those who wronged us.  To fight for Satan is a noble misguided cause.  To fight for Michael is a glory train of bad choices and patriarchal fuckups that gets you nailed to a cross.


To fight for the traitor, why, that takes special madness.  You get put on Earth, in the end.


We are never the heroes in our stories, and my sadness runs deep as the liar’s grave I fill.  In the end, I hurt everyone, all because I wanted to be the architect of my own story, or perhaps I was playing both sides all along.  An instigator for the war.  Flying to steal the glory of god for humanity, too close to the sun I touched eternal fire and brought it back for those hairless apes.  Goading on Samael and Michael to rough it out over me.  I am  the only thing they cared about, at least momentarily, in the end (of my life, not there’s – there’s is a cause, a higher purpose, and mine is the trickster mentality).


Whatever happened, history may be doomed ot repeat.  Or maybe now, I finally get the chance to redeem myself.  Maybe now, I won’t bleed black ink from adamant veins.


We are never the heroes we thought we were, but maybe, on the flight of a lark, on a vespertine moon’s last rays, we can become something like God.

Obscura Sep 11 '18 · Comments: 3
Obscura TITS
As an avid fan of Sumerian mythology, it has always perplexed me that some Satanists equate Satan with Enki, which is clearly not the mythological case.  Samael, as it were, directly sprang from the warrior god of plagues and the black sun and underworld, Nergal.  His cultus survived in Harran amongst the Sabeans well into the Middle Ages where Samael was worshipped by the name Shemal, directly correlated with Nergal in the trinity of Sin and Inanna and Nergal in this pagan tradition.  Shemal was the Lord of the North, god of Mars, lord of demons and djinn, and where the name Samael came from.  Additionally, there is the simoom, or Samiel wind, the hottest desert phenomena on this planet that occurs in the Middle East.  None of this rings "Enki."  Enki is Lord of the Waters.  Who else is Lord of the Waters?  Jesus.  Enki is a Creator, Nergal is a Destroyer.  In stealing Me from Enki, who is the keeper of knowledge, Inanna stole this prototype of Jesus' flame and gave it to humanity.  And in the garden and struggle against the Annunaki, who liberated humanity?  Enki!  He is a father god like El, yet also the closest thing the Sumerian pantheon had to a Savior.  If you look closely at Jesus, he is a Trickster.  He puts demons into pigs for fun and curses fig trees and speaks in parables of riddles and destroys the social establishment by being a renegade and overturning tables and wine in the Temple.  Enki, in turn, disobeys the social order of Sumerians and is their Trickster.  Trickster occurs in all cultures, but Enki and Jesus, if anyone bothers to work with their energies, are practically one and the same!  Water.  Fluid.  Enlightened.  Humorous.  Great power, saviors, keepers and dispensers of celestial wisdom and liberators of humanity.  Enki is much more directly connected to Jesus than Samael, who is a direct correlation to Nergal.  Satan is derived from Nergal, a far cry and completely opposite deity from Enki, who is corresponded to Jesus throughout Sumerian mythology.  It takes a quick Google search and glance at Wikipedia to prove the overlap between Enki and Jesus (LORD OF THE WATER) and even more obvious is the direct correspondence between Nergal (root of the Demiurge) who is LITERALLY Samael, the oldest form of Satan.  So if you want a Sumerian correspondence for a Satanic God, just fucking worship Nergal.  I promise you, there is practically NO DIFFERENCE BESIDES ONE BEING A GOD AND ONE BEING AN ARCHANGEL ARCHDEMON SASSY TALKING SNAKE SKELETON DRAGON THINGY.  And if you want to, invoke Enki and Christ at the same time. I dare you.  They will merge.


BEWARE NIBIRU


Obscura Sep 5 '18 · Rate: 5 · Comments: 10
scespedes
Reno!
scespedes Sep 5 '18 · Comments: 1
Obscura TITS

The Lightbringer attended to his duties.


Idly, he ate a wormy pomegranate, dressed in a white tunic.  Black veins ran like a map across his back, spreading to chalk-white shoulders.  He lingered in the shadows, watching the Milky Way canoe toward the outer boundaries of heaven.  The stars hung like fireflies above, reflecting off the perfection of his skin as he stood under the boundless moon.  The satellite drifted slowly across the hours, and the music of the spheres churned as time’s machinations moved the night to day.


Cherubim whirled above, shifting mixtures of man and beast that carried the heavens on their backs.  They shepherded the stars, singing in ethereal tones.  At a glance they resembled dragons with human faces blossoming from pearly wings.  Their backs were shelled like tortoises or jeweled beetle carapaces that upon closer inspection resembled intricate, interlocking armor.  One could not discern if their human forms were consumed in biological plating or if they truly were chimeras.


He watched them.  Once, that had been his duty, but no more.  He softly touched the twin scars that mounted his shoulder-blades.  The old red fire of the wound flared.  He smirked, then put out the Morning Star – proudest in all the constellations – with his thumb.  The planet Venus dimmed, only to blaze into life again when he lowered his hand.  He laughed drily and finished the fruit, tossing it over the canyon rim below.


The song of the cherubim lilted.  They descended like flaming wheels, swooping down below into the landscape obscured by night.  Their voices faded to silence.  The angels’ chimeric forms resolved into those of men.  In hollows of darkness they stood, flesh beginning to glow, then blazed into pillars of light.  Each beam rocketed up into the sky to match a star above.  The stars flickered in time with their breaths.


He smiled at his brothers’ devotion as his chest began to thrum like a drumbeat.  The skin over his heart glowed blue-white, burning with sweet agony.  He contained a scream that would have rose to ragged ululations of ecstasy, just as each of his brothers held their tongues.


Gritting his teeth, he let his glory pour forth.  It seared, the substance of divinity firing upward to Venus.  His mind was consumed; he let the waves of pain rush against him like water crashing to shore.  The frothing foam scattered memories like sea glass: his Father’s hands in his, teaching him to shape the cosmos to his will.  His fingers on the locks of a yellow-haired girl, braiding them meticulously with roses.  He recalled how his hands had fumbled then, picking the thorns off for her before wending the vines between the golden strands.  He had had no callouses then, no scars-


The fires of the heavens roared like a waterfall.  The sun was on the verge of rising.  His pain intensified.  He closed his eyes, clasping his hands in prayer.


Hands told stories; some said they determined fate.  A heart line slashed across a palm spoke of love, a six-lined star meant protection.  The meanings, for mortals, were endless.


His hands were blank.  The only marks on his skin were the ones he had earned.


“Where is your fate line?” she had asked long ago, laughing.


“Fate line?  I have none, Eve.”


“That is a pity.  How can you choose your destiny, if you have no guide to it?”  She traced the absence of his palms.


He flexed his pinions. “I have my wings- that is enough.”


She touched their snowy whiteness.  “Flying is one thing, brother, but without a map, where will you go?”


“I know where I am going, child.  Some paths are best left unknown.”


But he had strayed down shady roads in the coming eons, and the pearly wings grew to not be enough.


One evening, he tried drawing delicate curves on his palms with her sewing needles.  Over and over he dug them, deeper into his flesh, until the needles stuck through his hand.  Each time they healed, devoid of scars.  She caught him unawares and screamed when she saw him.


“Not like this!” she had howled, plucking the needles from his palms and bandaging him with torn strips of her dress.  She ran her fingers through his hair, hands so soft and cool against his temple they could be milk.  So small he could enfold them like a butterfly, which he did.  He steadied her shaking, afraid she would crack like a doll.  “This is my fault,” she wept as he rocked her.  “You have no need of stupid fate lines.  Your wings are enough to guide you.  Can’t you see how whole you are?  I am not.  I was jealous of you, brother, jealous!  You are the prince of the angels, have all and I have nothing.  I am made of dust and sorrow; I walk through the dirt and mud.  Father regrets me – he damns my curiosity, I, who was merely made to revel in creation.  I am a broken thing: I go against my nature in craving to create what I am meant to enjoy.  Ever since we were expelled from Eden, I cannot read the damned things on my hands.”


He clasped her hands in his, wings enfolding her.  “I can,” he whispered, “and you are the most whole thing I have ever known.”


“You can read them?” she asked weakly.  “What do they say?”


“They say that you are the wisest of all creatures, Eve, and that nothing I have done is your fault.  That in you lies the fire of a million generations.  The only fate we control is our own.”


Her gaze could still the ocean: “Then promise me you will never do anything that hurts you, ever again, Lucifer.  Promise me you will be gentle as you have always been and treat yourself with the same care you give me.”


“I promise, Eve.  Though I would not call myself gentle-”


She silenced him with a kiss, both ignoring that the way their paths were headed, it was a promise he would not keep.  He recalled how he had cupped her face like it was manna.  His hands, entwined in her hair –


The sun crept closer to the rim of the horizon.  His heart scorched, ribs burning in his chest.  Tears welled in his eyes.  Those hands, which he would now shudder to place on her snowy flesh, broke their fervent prayer.


He examined them, removed.  They profaned all they touched, sullied with the stains of ages.  Blood, tears, piss, plagues.  Yet no matter what he did, they remained clean.  His brothers were all the same.  Try as they might, they could not write their own stories.  All they did was erased from their skin.


Their fates had been determined for them.  The only scars they were allowed to keep were those earned at ultimate cost.


The stars blotted out one by one, waiting.  He flexed his fingers.  Once, the slender digits had brought life to mortal lips.  Now they drew souls out of mouths.  Just like he had cast off one name for another, he had traded purposes after the Fall:


“No,” he had pleaded, tears in his eyes.  “My name is Lucifer.  The bright and morning star.”


“And now it is Samael, the poison and venom of God.  Your gifts will be suffering and death.”


“No!  I am the Lightbringer!”


“And now that light would burn you.  Death cannot bear life.  You killed her in your folly!  To repeat that would be madness-”


“I am beyond madness and your wretched salvation, Michael.  Do not offer me repentance.  I was trying to save her.  I will save her!  What is dead can be brought back to life.  Eve’s soul is mine, mine.”


“You damned her from the moment she met you.”


He roared her name in agony.  The Morning Star stood belfry to the first rays of sun.  Pain forgotten, he was lost in the onslaught of his mind.


Hell is not a place, but the past.  He carried it with him always.  The angels below were lost in their own tortures.  They pleaded their cases before the sun.  Perhaps, this morning, they would be forgiven.  For his brothers were each of them fallen, bereft of their Creator, alone.


The sun rose in judgment, washing out the light of the Morning Star.  He screamed and doubled over as his flesh seared to the bone.  The penetrating rays licked him the clean white bone of the Reaper, rendering him into a skeleton.  He saw with eyes that were black hollows, and rose to embrace the deadly radiation.


The landscape pooled before him.  A red desert raced out to brimming golden mountains, where dawn gently lapped over the ruins of a once magnificent city.  It was carved into the cliff faces like Petra, inhospitable to humans.  No steps or bridges connected the towering abodes – sheer drops followed the open doors – and there were none of the comforts of civilization, merely bare floors dusted with wildflowers.  The fallen angels shook below as they prayed, flesh peeling as their blood pooled on the ground.  Wind stirred the sand into molten plumes, like hourglasses in reverse, grains snaking through fallen pillars and stories upon stories of sandstone.  It buffeted him, sliding between his ribs.  A great thundering came from the distance.


“Welcome, brother,” he murmured as the solar angel stirred to his vigil.  Soon, a figure shadowed the sun.  Michael landed atop the sere cliff, facing his twin.  “Time to slay the beast,” the Morning Star said.


Tears were in Michael’s eyes.  “You know this is never necessary, Samael.”  He laid his weapons at his twin’s feet.


“Your sword, dear brother, through the neck.  Or the heart, if you prefer.  I seem to lack one, I suppose.  A downside to being bone-”


“Why, day after day, do you torment me with this?”  The question hung like the gallows over their heads.  “Our brothers below us are suffering.  Above us, they are weeping.  All Heaven and Hell become one, and you prolong it with your murder.”


“It is yours too, my twin,” he said, almost tender.  The bone-man walked to Michael’s side, dabbing at the tears with his claw hands.  “Damn these things,” he said, looking at his fingers in disgust. “I have had too much time alone with my palms.”


“In that we may find solidarity.  Mine tire of bearing weapons.  If you would only quit your stubbornness, the War would end immediately.”


“If only it were that simple.  I always envied you your straightforward thinking.  Whose load is heavier, brother: the Lightbearer, or he who bears the sword?  One’s burden is insubstantial-”


“Enough with your damn riddles!”  Michael roared, slapping the skull’s cheek.  “Repent!  Come home, brother.  Be whole.”


Samael’s hand lingered on his smarting jawbone.  “No.”


Michael took his brother’s shoulders in his hands.  “Each day you pray for forgiveness, and we grant it to you.  Then you reject it.  You – all of you!-” he yelled across the canyons, down at the fallen ones, silver tears in his emerald eyes, “-choose suffering over redemption.  Why, my brother?  Why?”


“Because, Michael.  It is our lot.  The suffering, the scars, make us whole.  There is no going back to Eden.”


“I know,” whispered Michael, sorrowful, “but I can hope.”  He embraced his brother slowly, shaking, and kissed his bony brow.


“What is dead cannot be brought back to life, as you said so long ago.  Look at me as I truly am,” Samael laughed drily.  “Such a prince of angels I would make.  No, that path is now yours, and your halo is ill-suited for me.  The only crown fitting me is one of thorns.”  He lifted Michael’s sword and pressed it to his ribs.  “For her?” Samael asked gently.


Michael obliged.  In a scene old as time, he slayed the beast, killing the darkness which would rise once more next evening, only to be slaughtered come morning tithe.  Over and over they engaged in the battle, trapped in their own hells, hearts torn asunder anew.  Samael had died many times – in truth, he craved it.  As the Angel of Death, it was him.  Each time, it brought him closer to her- in the blackness he could feel her, the hollow emptiness of his heart that marked her unknown grave.


Broken, Michael pushed him over the edge.  Gabriel trumpeted above.


The earth opened like a great maw to swallow him up.


“Eve,” Samael called softly, plummeting into the abyss.  The ground sucked the fallen angels down into the pit, denying them God’s saving grace.  In their fall, they burned proud.


Michael wiped his blade clean of rot.


The tithe was paid.


The day was born.

Obscura Sep 4 '18 · Rate: 5 · Comments: 2
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